September 8, 2009

Gone, Now, & Soon

Gone, Now, & Soon

Gone are the days that I can hear a pregnancy announcement and truly be excited.

Gone are the days of openly and freely dreaming about our family.

Gone are the days of attempting to plan when my maternity leave would “work out best”.

Gone are the days of buying cute onesies because they are on clearance.

Gone are the days of peeing on a stick and actually feeling hopeful.

Gone are the days of telling family that we’re pregnant before reaching the 12 week “safe zone”.

Gone are the days of living care free and spontaneous.



Now are the days of figuring out when I will get my next shots, ultrasound, or blood draw.

Now are the days of praying that God will hear our prayers and desires to be able to have a child.

Now are the days of tear filled mornings and nights.

Now are the days of anxiously worrying.

Now are the days of wondering if this one will stick.

Now are the days of feeling helpless, confused, and insecure.




Soon will be the days of joy.

Soon will be the days of unreserved happiness.

Soon will be the days that I will hear a heartbeat(s).

Soon will be the days that I will make Matt a father, my parents grandparents, and my sister an aunt.

Soon will be the days that we will look back on this time with thankfulness that God brought us though it, because we will have our babies in our arms.

4 comments:

Brittany said...

I found your blog accidently, and I'm so glad that I did.

Wow.....your words brought me to tears.

I want you to know....I've been there, I've suffered 2 miscarriages and I remember the feeling of innocence leaving......where blood draws determine pregnancy and only in week 13 do you start to smile and celebrate. I've been there and I want you to know the road at the end of the dark tunnel is reachable. Don't give up hope or faith - your baby is awaiting your arms soon!

Brittany

lowfatlady said...

*hugs* I'm sorry you had to go through this. I feel the same way to a lot of your now comments. I hope your able to get one stick soon.

Hoping for our own Peanut said...

what a beautiful post.

soon is right, hun. soon your pain will be replaced with joy of pregnancy. i wish i could say when..or how..but just keep telling youself SOON and youll get through this!

Shane said...

were thinking about you and Matt over here in waterloo.