September 22, 2009

St. Louis...a recap in pictures

Since I am IN LOVE with our new camera, I thought I'd "show" you about my to St. Louis with my dad and sister.


No mommy... don't go!!! (Or take me with you!)



















Needless to say we had a great time and a great trip!

September 16, 2009

a video to sum up my feelings from the past few weeks

I would say this pretty much sums up my feelings right now. This is a very cool video, enjoy.



Lyrics:

Jenny was my best friend.
Went away one summer.
Came back with a secret
She just couldn't keep.
A child inside her,
Was just too much for her
So she cried herself to sleep.

And she made a decision
Some find hard to accept.
To young to know that one day
She might live to regret.

But I would die for that.
Just to have one chance
To hold in my hands
All that she had.
I would die for that.

I've been given so much,
A husband that I love.
So why do I feel incomplete?
With every test and checkup
We're told not to give up.
He wonders if it's him.
And I wonder if it's me.

All I want is a family,
Like everyone else I see.
And I won't understand it
If it's not meant to be.

Cause I would die for that.
Just to have one chance
To hold in my hands
All that they have.
I would die for that.

And I want to know what it's like
To bring a dream to life.
For that kind of love,
What I'd give up!
I would die for that.

Sometimes it's hard to conceive,
With all that I've got,
And all I've achieved,
What I want most
Before my time is gone,
Is to hear the words
"I love you, Mom."

I would die for that.
Just to have once chance
To hold in my hands
What so many have
I would die for that.

And I want to know what it's like
To bring a dream to life.
How I would love
What some give up.
I would die ...
I would die for that.

September 11, 2009

Off!

I'm off for a grand trip with my dad and sister (who I haven't seen in months b/c she lives in Orlando). Matt leaves for Indiana for work related "stuff" this weekend, so I'm taking off with the fam!




September 8, 2009

Gone, Now, & Soon

Gone, Now, & Soon

Gone are the days that I can hear a pregnancy announcement and truly be excited.

Gone are the days of openly and freely dreaming about our family.

Gone are the days of attempting to plan when my maternity leave would “work out best”.

Gone are the days of buying cute onesies because they are on clearance.

Gone are the days of peeing on a stick and actually feeling hopeful.

Gone are the days of telling family that we’re pregnant before reaching the 12 week “safe zone”.

Gone are the days of living care free and spontaneous.



Now are the days of figuring out when I will get my next shots, ultrasound, or blood draw.

Now are the days of praying that God will hear our prayers and desires to be able to have a child.

Now are the days of tear filled mornings and nights.

Now are the days of anxiously worrying.

Now are the days of wondering if this one will stick.

Now are the days of feeling helpless, confused, and insecure.




Soon will be the days of joy.

Soon will be the days of unreserved happiness.

Soon will be the days that I will hear a heartbeat(s).

Soon will be the days that I will make Matt a father, my parents grandparents, and my sister an aunt.

Soon will be the days that we will look back on this time with thankfulness that God brought us though it, because we will have our babies in our arms.